Saturday 22 March 2014

The Honeyed Lips Of Death

Hi readers & followers,

Apologies for not publishing a post on Monday; I have had a busy week, a busy month of March.

Myss Lafunky was invited to a Christian radio show ‘Before I do’ on Hephzibah radio. It was my first guest appearance on a Christian show and I had a great time, thanks to people that tuned in. The show is usually on Thursdays, 7pm-9pm, download Hephzibah radio on your tablet, phones, etc and listen to it. It’s a great show.

As you know that, Myss Lafunky and her co-writers (Twale, Tosin, Ife & co) usually write post about relationship with people, relationship with your spouse, courtship, dating, and above all relationship with God.  We also take on the “Agony Aunt” role so, feel free to send in your comments, questions, contributions, etc. We shall be happy to help and we adhere to strict confidentiality.

Here goes the post…

I woke up, thinking and regretting marrying my husband. I had been told that God hates divorce and that I cannot leave my husband. Yet, the same Bible says that, you can divorce your spouse on the basis of adultery. So, why can’t I leave? I think I’m scared of what the society will say, I am scared of what people in my church will say, how can I bring up my daughter without her father? How can I continue to be a Deaconess in church as a single mother? Would my title be removed from me?  What can I do?  I am hopeless, actually, I shouldn’t vocalise my thought of hopelessness as that’s not biblical…as the Bible says that…life and death are in the power of the tongue.

Today marks the 2nd year that I married my husband, I courted my husband for 8 months and although I didn’t really know my husband very well before I agreed to marry him, I trusted that God will guide and lead me right since I’m His daughter. Since the day that I married my husband, I had suspected my husband to be cheating. He answered strange phone calls away from where I could listen to his conversation and inappropriate text messages from a particular number lurked on my husband’s phone. When I challenged my husband about the text messages, he denied anything was going on and blamed it on his number being available to anyone in his organisation who had access to the staff contact directory. I became a detective and a prayer warrior in my house. Since the Bible says that faith without action is dead, I decided to continue to monitor my husband’s phone including his social media accounts and I embarked on serious prayers, in fact, I went on marathon prayers; I prayed naked, I fasted and I did so many other things, yet, the calls and messages continued.

Not too long after my suspicion grew, I requested that my husband used protection before we could be intimate physically but he said that I didn’t trust him and he was angry that I even suggested it. But I was losing my mind! I reported the issue to our pastor and the head of his department but they couldn’t believe me, they looked puzzled and one of the leaders even said: “Bro Zee is such a good man, helpful, available, humble, gentle and sound in the Word.

Nobody seemed to believe me!!! Though I became more persistent in my prayers, I eventually became depressed at home and at work, my colleagues wondered what was wrong with me but I couldn’t  say much more than “I’m just passing through a phase in my marriage.” Soon, I started reducing going to church programmes as I felt that the leaders I had spoken to about my marriage were supporting my husband and not doing much to help me, they were judging my husband by what he portrayed to them in church. The depression was becoming evident in many areas of my life much like a cancerous growth.

Just when I thought things couldn’t get any worse than it already was, the worst up heaved its head; I got infected with Gonorrhoea! I just couldn’t explain how I got it because the only person I had ever been intimate with since my marriage was my dear husband. When I told my husband about it, he busted out in anger. His notion was that I had been living a promiscuous life and been “gracefully” rewarded for my actions. He made it clear to me then that he didn’t want me to get him infected so, he wouldn’t be making love with me till I was cleared of the infection. “God!! What have I done to deserve all this?” I cried.

But last Mothers Sunday, the Sun came piercing through my dark cloud. During the morning charge in my church, my husband told the Pastor that he had something to share to everyone. He knelt in front of me and openly apologised to me. He said he had offended God and his wife and he needed to stop his pretence and put things straight. My husband shared with everyone that prior to getting married, he got into a fling with one of his work colleagues and he had kept the relationship up until the month before that Sunday. He told the church workers that he has ended the relationship and he would like to seek God’s mercy openly and also, he would like to step down from his position as a Deacon until God directed him to resume that office. Furthermore, he shared with everyone that, he would like to thank me, his wife, for not leaving him and he apologised for living a life of pretence.

Although it was difficult to forgive my husband, I had to forgive him as Jesus forgave me of all that I had done. I am also grateful that my husband was able to realise his mistake and take a U-turn. It hasn’t been an easy journey I must say but we continued to pray and helped each other on a daily basis.

Now, it’s been 5 years down the line since this happened, today is our 7th Wedding anniversary and my husband now has a ministry of helping and teaching both single and married men about the importance of staying pure.

Proverbs 5:3-4 (NLT) says:
The lips of an immoral woman are as sweet as honey, and her mouth is smoother than oil.  But the result is as bitter as poison, sharp as double-edged sword.

The lips here that ‘are as sweet as honey’, are the lips of the third party, that person outside the marriage. The attraction may seem indescribably wonderful, the kisses are as if one had never been kissed before, but all this is just an illusion.  For what was once sweet will soon turn bitter, it will dry one’s spirit like a poison saps one’s strength, and will pierce through hearts with great pain.
The admonition is clear; it is wise to STAY AWAY from honeyed lips.

Men and women, rejoice in the wife or husband of your youth. The Bible says that you will find much blessing if you rejoice in her (Proverbs 5:18).  Create no room for adultery, violence, coldness, disdain, negative influence of third parties but rather, welcome warmth, love, laughter, happiness, contentment, positive intimacy with each other.

-          Myss Lafunky 

Monday 10 March 2014

Your Relationship with God: Ten Things to Consider As a Young Person

Happy Monday to my lovely readers and followers!

Hope you had a lovely weekend?

Below post is worth reading, it was written by my friend, he is a regular writer on my blog.


A) The scene is being made clear for the youth to walk the work of Christ on earth.

B) Parents have toiled and are no longer able to do a whole lot of things and are passing the baton unto the youth or better still the younger generation.

C) The earlier days of our godly Christian parents when they first received the gospel of peace (the salvation gospel) was explosive, full of passion and zeal. They conquered territories. They gave for the propagation of the gospel. Their lives were not all about the jobs or their businesses.

D) Today the priority seems to have shifted. The average youth is concerned about the accumulation of certificates in academics (GCSEs, BSc, BA, MBBS, MBA Ph.D, LLM LLB, ACCA, etc) and other professional qualifications. There is nothing about the faith on the agenda. The youth seem content with attending church services when available and when convenient.

E) Good jobs with high salaries are the utmost dimension of fulfilment (Hmm..can you relate to this?)

F)  Prayer meetings are left for the aged ones who are believed to have lived their lives and the youth have to live their own lives now.

G)  Matthew 6.33 is now misunderstood whereas it is the formula for greatness or rather success as far as God is concerned. The order of concerns in this verse is the kingdom of God following which all other things are added. Today, the order being applied which is failing us is all other things following which the kingdom of God.
‘Seek ye first the kingdom of God and his righteousness and all other things shall be added unto you’.

H) Priorities need be placed on God for best outcomes to be made. An interest in that which pertains to God must be developed for the move of God to be mightier than we know it to be.

I) God must not be portrayed as our last resort in circumstances or our emergency hotline.

J) Scriptures says Enoch walked with God and it further states that God is our ever present help in the times of trouble. God is always their for us, He is always by our side.

K) Now is the time to get closer and more intimate with God.

L) Your success in life is not the issue on the floor here but rather the issue of your relationship with God . Myss Lafunky quoted from the Bible: What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? Or what can anyone give in exchange for their soul? (Matthew 16:26).


Things must turn out to be the Lord's way of doing things. Your parents must no longer be seen as the architect of your future by virtue of the contributions they have made in your life in terms of financial input and counsel alongside bringing you up in the way of God.

Note - If your parents are not Born Again Christians, break the chain and dedicate your life to Christ. Ensure the generation from you know the Lord.

Myss Lafunky noted the below 10 things for Young People to take into consideration regarding their relationship with God:

I) Choose to follow ALL His teachings. Once you have the desire to follow Him, The Holy Spirit will help you.
2) Prioritise Him first in all that you do, including in your everyday routine, during exams time, etc.
3) Talk to Him everyday..even before you check your social media/before you speak to anybody.
4) Dare to be different for God in your everyday choices and decisions.
5) Know what God likes and what He does not like ( You will only know what God likes when you read the Holy Bible and when you pray to Him).
6) Be a Giver! 
7) Always ask God for instructions and counsel before you do anything.
8) Never think you know it all, even if you have given your life to Christ for over a decade ago.
9) Pray to God about your family, lost souls and relatives.
10) Continue to develop a good character. Always work on your weaknesses.

Oluwatosin Olatoye

About the writer: Tosin is a trained Lawyer. He lives in Warri, Nigeria.  Tosin has a passion for God and everything to do with living right for God.  

Monday 3 March 2014

Winning the Respect of Others. Must I?

Happy Monday to my lovely followers and readers!

How was your weekend? Hope you had a great weekend?  I had an awesome weekend! I attended a bridal shower and it was amazing to see my friends. We all gathered from all over England to say our well-wishes to our bride-to-be before she cleaves to her husband and before she is licensed to have sex:).

I was given a book to read, the book is titled 'Winning with People by John Maxwell'.  I'm in the process of completing the book. The first 50 pages have made me to focus a lot on my own actions and thought pattern rather than how others react or how they think.

The main focus of the book is about winning with people. I questioned the title of the book. I asked myself, must I win with people? Must I win the respect of others? The answers were right in the Bible. Isn't it interesting that the Bible has all the answers to every questions you may have?

The Bible says:

" So that your daily life may win the respect of outsiders.." (1 Thessalonians 4:12-NIV)

When others look at our lives, what do they see?  Do the way we live our lives show that we are Jesus Christ's representatives here on earth?

In line with the above scripture, Joel Osteen stated that "Our daily life should win the respect of others".

For us to ensure that we win the respect of others, we must apply the below principle which is rooted from the Word of God:

Have self-control.
Understand it from other people's point of view (In the John Maxwell's book, this is referred to as 'the Power of Perspective).
Make other people's interest your own.
Admit it when you are wrong.
Never Criticize publicly.

Reason don't argue.
Explain thoroughly.
Lead don't drive.
Avoid snap judgements.
Take care of little things.
Inform people of matters affecting them.
Offer helpful suggestions..
Never make promises you cannot keep.
Stress the positive always.

NB - Thanks to my special friend and companion who shared the above principle with me, and usually ensures that any time that I err, reference is made to the above principle.

Dare to be different. Copy and keep a copy of the above principle and apply it. The acronym for it is HUMAN-RELATIONS.

Implementing the principle would help us to be an example in our speech, in conduct, in purity, in love, in faith, in everything.

                          Here's a little Prayer 
Lord Jesus, I dedicate every area of my life and emotions to you today. Lord Jesus, help me to live my daily life as an example of Your love. Let me honour and please you in all that I do, so that my daily life wins respect of others in Jesus name (Amen).

- Myss Lafunky
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