Thursday 16 May 2013

Should I confront Person B?

It's nearly Friday. Should I start thanking God that it's nearly Friday? I can't wait for the weekend.  It's going to be exciting. I'm going to be undertaking a task that I love so much.

You may be wondering why I'm publishing a post during the week, given that I usually post an article on Sunday or Monday.  Basically, there's something that is very heavy in my heart, I need your advice.

Here it goes:

A friend of mine was on the phone with me, and my friend had a visitor (who is also my friend too).  For the purpose of this post, I will refer the visitor as Person B, while my friend is Person A.  Basically, Person A opened the door for Person B.

Person A put my phone call on hold, person A was chatting with Person B while I was still on hold.

Person B was not aware that I was on the phone, person B started talking about me, person B was saying things that were not so nice about me.  I was flabbergasted! I became upset and I got tired of listening to what Person B was saying, I eventually dropped the call.

After the incident, I later saw Person B, Person B was extremely friendly towards me. However, I was fuming inside, I didn't confront Person B.

Should I confront Person B?

How do you handle friends that gossip about you and you later found out? How do you ensure that there is no animosity between you?

-Myss Lafunky

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  1. Wonderful! My advice is that you forgive person B. Then, you let person B know you heard what they said about you and that you were upset by their actions but you have forgiven them. This is so you do not hold any grudge - load off your chest. Continue to do good to them. By so doing, the burning coals would be on their head as you would have repaid evil for good according to proverbs 25:21-22.

    1. Thank you Bernado. To continue to do good knowing what someone had said about one is really not easy. Nonetheless, I shan't ignore the person. I will be wise in my dealings wih them.

  2. OMG!!!! this is deep and it must have hurt! Did person A say anything regarding this to u, knowing that u heard? uhmmm..I agree with Bernado. But can I just add that it also depends on what they were saying. is it something that u can just overlook because one thing I have learnt over the last months is the power of silence. Sometimes just saying nothing might be good n also gives u power over them. So if its something that u can ignore, forgive n forget completely. Then maybe do and just ask God for grace. remember there re also others who are talking behind us, but we will never always know! You know one of my fav quotes already: not everybody has to like me as long as I am justified and I have a right standing with God. Another imp point is to evaluate what what said, is there any learning point for u? perhaps something u can learn or improve on?

    1. Thank you Ruth. You are right, it's about the right standing with God. Nonetheless, we still have to be courteous and sensitive towards others, the tool to implement it is: "loving others as we love ourselves".

      I've actually reflected on what I heard, nothing to reflect on to be honest.

      Person A didn't respond whilst Person B was talking about me. Obviously Person A knew I was on the phone, given that it was Person A that put the phone call on hold.

      It's shocking really how people are. What they won't say in front of an individual, they will be quick to say it behind one's back. These are ways that people err, yet most people are oblivious to it.

      There's a reason why I heard the discussion. I've however learnt how some people are, they could smile in front of you yet stab one behind one's back. It's reality really. Howbeit, we Christians are to show love, sacrificial love even when it is difficult. Love is kind, love cares, etc.

      I won't approach the person, however, if I begin to have animosity towards Person B, I will approach the individual. After all, Matthew 18:15 states that, if a believer does something wrong, we should go and confront the individual, when the two of you are alone. If he listens to you, you have won back that individual.

      Nonetheless, the help of the Holy Spirit is needed when we are confronting other believers.

  3. I agree with you about loving others as you love yourself. That is how it should be but for some reasons, some Christians don't show it...for various reasons. This is the reason why it is important for churches now adays to teach people all these principles and balance it with prosperity and warfare teachings etc. Love is the answer to a lot of problems in this world to be honest. If everyone can show genuine love to one another the world will defo be a much better place! It is well.

    I meant what person A said to u afterwards..not that it matters now, just thought they would have been in an akward position!

    Don't even let it bother u especially as u said that u weighed it and its not important! People will always talk. Issues like this forms experience, just be careful in ur vigilant!

    1. I will DEFINITELY be vigilant. Experience is the best teacher. Also, some people do not need to have the practical experience but they can however learn from other people's experiences, hence why I shared it on my blog.